Where does our fear of birth come from?
Why do we let society put such a negative spin on birth? Why do we allow it to make us feel apprehensive?
If you were to take a moment to think about birth, what would come to mind? Probably fear, pain, screaming, blood... the list goes on. We live in a society that perceives birth as all of these things, from watching One Born Every Minute to hearing what our friends and family tell us about their own birth experiences. Fear of birth is conditioned into our minds.
What’s important to remember is that dramas and films that portray birth are always going to show the most dramatic birth scenes. Because of this, society often sees birth as being just that—dramatic!
Now, let’s stop and think for a minute about mammals (stay with me on this). Female mammals have the same birth process as we do because we are mammals too. We all share the same birth hormones: oxytocin, endorphins and adrenaline. These hormones help to start the birth process effectively. So, what gets in the way? Fear!
Mammals in the wild do not fear the birth process. They haven’t been told frightening stories by their fellow mammals, and they certainly haven’t watched One Born Every Minute. They instinctively find a safe place to give birth to their young, away from predators. We, on the other hand, often choose not to give birth in a place where we feel truly safe. Of course, there isn’t a lion waiting to eat us at the hospital, but we may choose to go somewhere that makes us feel anxious rather than relaxed and secure.
When we feel anxious, our adrenaline levels rise and we enter fight-or-flight mode. This creates stress and can slow down labour. What happens when labour slows down? We begin to believe our bodies cannot give birth. Healthcare professionals may use the term “failure to progress”. As a result, we panic more, produce more adrenaline, and the cycle continues.
Birth does not have to be like this!
A woman who is free from fear, feels safe, is surrounded by familiar faces, and is free to move around will produce higher levels of oxytocin and endorphins. Oxytocin is your best friend during birth. It stimulates the muscles involved in contractions, which in turn releases more oxytocin and endorphins, and so the cycle continues. Isn’t that a much better cycle to be stuck in?
So, what can you do next?
It’s actually quite simple. You can prepare for your birth. I don’t just mean attending your midwife appointments, getting the nursery ready, or packing your hospital bag. I mean really preparing for birth! Read a hypnobirthing book, practise relaxation techniques, surround yourself with positive birth stories, and stay away from One Born Every Minute!
Above all, complete a comprehensive birth preparation course—one that doesn’t just teach you how to breathe, but explains the ins and outs of birth itself. Choose a course that guides you through each stage of labour, teaches you how to navigate a stretched maternity system, helps you overcome any fears you may have, and replaces them with confidence.
Bespoke Hypnobirthing Course
You’ve probably heard someone say, “Why plan for birth when birth never goes to plan?” Let me tell you why that argument doesn’t quite hold up.
Yes, birth rarely goes exactly as hoped — but it’s the moments when things go off-plan that knowing your options matters most. I know this because I’ve been there. Even though my birth didn’t unfold the way I imagined, having a plan was the single biggest reason it was still a positive experience. No one can predict what will happen in labour (despite what some might claim), but you can walk into your maternity unit feeling informed, confident, and in control — with pain-busting tools to lean on when things get intense and resilience to cope for longer when it really counts.
“I was extremely nervous and worried about the thought of giving birth, so signed up for one of Katie’s free Hypnobirthing taster sessions. It was a great introduction and made me keen to learn more. Following this, we signed up for the 1:1 hypnobirthing course. Katie shared some amazing techniques, the ins and outs of birth and empowered me to approach birth in a positive way.
I went into labour naturally, and really benefitted from the breathing techniques and not being afraid to question professionals! Thank you Katie.”
Megan and Jonathon
References-
Katrina Berry - Why Hypnobirthing Matters
